Let’s face it, most of us are born with a gavel in our hands. We judge others by our interactions with them, what we read on social media, their bad decisions, what we hear in idle gossip. Our sinful nature leads us down a slippery path where judgment can be something we aren’t even aware we’re doing.
And on the flipside, we all know how it feels to be on the other side of that judgment seat. I’m sure you have felt the sting of condemnation at least once or twice in your life. And how has it made you feel? I would wager not very good! No, not very good at all.
And here’s the agonizing truth: it’s easy to judge, it’s much harder to love.
But how do we go against our human nature and learn to model the perfect love of Jesus? How can we truly work to offer others less judgment and more love?
Let me give you something that has really helped me on this journey to love better. The movie, The Shack, had a profound impact on me. I know there are some controversial theological issues within the movie itself, but getting past those, the movie was inspiring.
In a nutshell, it’s a heart-wrenching story of a family who experiences the trauma of having their youngest child abducted and killed by a pedophile at a shack in the woods. They are Christians, but the dad and one of the daughters isn’t recovering from this horrific trauma at all.
The dad is extremely angry at God, questioning why he would let this happen to his little girl. Questions we all would more than likely wrestle with in this situation. Through a letter in a mailbox which led to an encounter with God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit at the shack, his heart is healed, forgiveness is offered, and his faith is restored.
The person who plays God in the movie, who is a woman, said a line over and over that has stayed with me. When the dad would start talking about someone, God would say, “I’m especially fond of him.” The theme of God being “especially fond” of all people was sprinkled throughout the entire movie.
Back to reality and my own experience, I was sitting in my own proverbial judgment seat one day, thinking about someone close to me who had just made some really hurtful decisions that were turning the lives of his family upside down. It was hard to witness their grief, and the gossip mill around me was a feeding frenzy.
In the middle of the incredible judgment going off in my mind, I heard a tender whisper in my soul, “I’m especially fond of him.” Whoa, did I really hear that? And then I heard it again. It stopped me in my tracks.
I was instantly convicted that it’s not my job to judge, that job belongs to God. My job is simply to love.
This little mantra has helped me immeasurably over the years. When I find myself once again climbing on that judgment seat, this phrase helps me get off a little bit quicker than I used to. I’m not perfect, and I never will be, but it’s a gentle reminder to do my very best to choose a different path.
One thing the movie got completely right was the message that above all else, God is love. And God’s Word is crystal clear about judgment:
“Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.”
Luke 6:37 (NIV)
No arguing with that one!
And the flip side is also very clearly and definitively spoken by Jesus and lived out in His beautiful life here on earth. His words leave no room for doubting what He calls us to do:
“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself.”
Matthew 22:37-39 (NIV)
My friend, I pray this mantra, “God is especially fond of him/her,” will serve as a gentle reminder to help you see others the way God sees them. I pray it helps keep your heart in check when judgment leaps into your mind.
Another tip from a fellow “work-in-progress” is that the more we know how much WE are loved, the more we are able to love others. As I’ve worked extremely hard on being less hard on myself and leaning more and more into the grace and mercy of my Loving Father, it’s so much easier to love others in return. The closer we get to love, the easier it is to let go of judgment.
As I like to say, love God, love others, love…that’s it!
And remember, my sweet friend, God is especially fond of YOU!
Hugs and love,
Jill
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